4/25/91- Road Closed

                                                                                                 4/25/91
                                                                                       South Egremont,MA
 
 
                          Road Closed
 
     Here I am
     Back in the thick of it
     Trying to get lost in a place
     I know better
           than a musician and his instrument
     Notes leading me,rests calling me
     I remember being in houses
     The owners are faded denim,cheap beer,
     Musty rooms,closed doors;
     All I have now.
 
     Dirt road beckons "I'm closed,
          did that ever stop you before?"
     Ruts like seams in a bad earthquake movie
     Rocks,culvert lunging at me
     My hands slack behind the wheel
     Hoping that the other end of this so called path
     Leads to magic,undiscovered places,secret worlds,
     The nearest paved road.
     "No turning back now,
          at least I won't have to come back this way..."
     
    
     I'm sorry
          I said that?
     Suddenly...
 
     That's it.
     Road really closed.
     Slowly I turn,inch by inch,
     The path I traveled I must travel again
     
    (I told you so)
     I've been there,this town,this road,this lesson,this feeling
     And I will appreciate it
     If the Earth doesn't swallow me
     Letting go...
 
     
     I'm back.
     
     My thoughts clear during this exercise
     My heart strong
     Only action remains
     But once again the road is smooth
     Release the safe ride
     Feel some fear and pain
     Grow in a way that doesn't make you
     Want to get lost
     Or run away.